All Hail The King

What does it mean to get older?
For one young man in Seattle, Washington, it means the preservation of youth.
Perhaps there is no one who remembers the youth of Jason Martin King better than we at TCO. He was a sprightly boy with monstrous calves even at the tender age of 8; the age we were when we first met. He was cute. His hair was blond and had the trendy shaved rim of a bowl cut. He often wore a light gray zip-up hoodie over a pink and white striped tee shirt. The shirt was reminiscent of surfing and sand, if only by the choppy way each stripe moved across his front; it immediately made one think of a new popular phrase that had been going around, “Whatever, dude.” Or, simply, it made one think of a trapper-keeper cover. His jeans were stonewashed and tight. By the end of that school year he wouldn’t really be able to fit in them anymore, but he'd make it work. His crisp, new, white tennis shoes were a generic brand not easily recognizable to those outside the Midwest. We instantly knew we would be fast friends, but who could ever have predicted just how many memorable years we were signing up for on that first day?
Now, fast approaching 30, Jason is on a quest. The years between 8 and 29 have afforded him countless adventures, many of which have involved hours spent driving in a low-gliding and pleasantly roomy Honda mini-van. He has not shied away from the appetites of any young man in the ways of drink, meat, and a good Venus flytrap. And he certainly would never back down from a duel with an enemy, especially if it required great physical dexterity and cunning wit. Jason's current greatest enemy? November 22, 2009. The day he will turn 30. The requirements of the duel between Jason and that fateful day? Simple. If Jason truly wants to preserve his youth, between now and then he must successfully dunk a basketball. And so, in this the age of the self-produced project, the blogosphere has now been blessed with one of the most humorous and captivating additions in quite sometime. Jason "The Dunk" King takes us on our favorite kind of journey, that of the noble underdog. Follow him from the moment he woke up and discovered his time to master the dunk was running out, to his first, ehem, pathetic dunk attempts, to his rigorous training schedule led by one of the most merciless "vertical workout" trainers in the business. You don't want to miss it; we guarantee that just like Jason managed to do with us so many years ago, he will charm you into loyal support of all things The King.
And now we wait with bated breath for that one successful dunk to slam us all into the next glorious phase of our adult lives. Can he do it, folks? We have no doubt.
You can either CLICK HERE or use the other link to Jason's blog, 'If This Guy Can Dunk,' to the right under 'TCO Required Reading'.

The Hunter or the Hunted?

Question: Is it possible to be in rare form all the time?
Answer: Not unless your name is Mr. Thomas Kristian Russell.

Many of you may know this man by any one of his rotating monikers (i.e. TK, Tom Kristian, Kristian), or perhaps you have been privy to at least one of his notorious exhibitions from an impressive history of antics during the adolescent years, or maybe you have been fortunate enough to share an expensive drink with him at a lavish five-star hotel bar in any given city around the U.S.
Regardless how you may know him, we can all agree that the natural order of the universe would be turned on its head if you were to find him confined to any one box, or bubble, or type-face. At his very core, Kristian is an artist. If given the opportunity, he could surely wave his wand and grant musicians name recognition, throw together a web clip that snags him a nomination for a renowned international award, or redefine the meaning of diabolical intrigue in reality television.
How do we know this? Easy. He's already doing it.

A master of the delicate balance between creative talent and fierce entrepreneurship, Kristian is the brains behind at least three start-up companies, two of which have formed since January 2009.
Inside Interactive is a modern design firm specializing in the promotion of brand identity through websites, online marketing campaigns, visual interfaces, episodic content and viral videos.
CANDYSHOP signs artists, bands and producers with the objective of placing their music in film, television and commercials.
Inside Productions, his newest endeavor, is a production company assigned the first task of shopping a new reality show, "Girl Hunter," to major networks. Co-created by Kristian and top New York chef, Georgia Pellegrini, "Girl Hunter" centers around one woman who hunts and cooks her own food using, among many other techniques of the survival trade, a hefty double barreled shotgun.
And if you think running three businesses sounds ambitious, it gets better. Through Inside Interactive, Kristian is also directing and producing a comedic mockumentary about the country music industry, "American Country". In 2007 he strategically leaked a teaser clip, "Dumb Blonde Mic Check" , onto the web, sat back, and watched as it eventually garnered over 5 million views, and was honored with "Official Selection" for the 2009 Webby Awards in the category of "Best Individual Performance for Online Film & Video". For those of you who don't know, the Webby Awards honors excellence on the Internet, in the categories of Websites, Interactive Advertising, Online Film & Video, and Mobile, and are presented by the International Academy of Digital Arts and Sciences. Take a look at some of the other nominees for an idea of his distinguished competition.
In the spirit of Ron Burgundy, we don't know how to put this but Kristian's kind of a big deal. And while we often playfully imagine him reclined in his Nashville home, surrounded by many leather-bound books, the scent of rich mahogany, and a glass of single malt scotch, do not be mistaken. This man has his finger on the pulse, sleeps with a knife under his pillow, and keeps a hawk-like eye ever on his next prey of creative opportunity.
As usual, you have homework. Check out the direct link to Candy Shop Songs and the direct link to Inside Interactive, both under 'TCO Required Reading'.

She Got Moves You Ain't Never Seen

There are few friends TCO has known longer than the astounding Jennifer "Jiffy" Reed. We knew Jennifer back when slap bracelets were just catching on (pun intended!), Debbie Gibson rivaled Tiffany on our hot pink boom box, and our classmates were dying of cholera along the Oregon Trail for two grueling afternoon hours in the classroom. Back in those days, Jennifer was one of an exclusive group of young girls aspiring to be a ballerina--it was an exciting morning recess the day they learned they had graduated to 'en pointe'. We saw our way together through junior high, and high school and then lost track of Jennifer for a little while during the college years. It wasn't until we eventually made our way out to NYC that we found her again, larger than life. Not only had Jennifer succeeded in becoming a professional ballerina and performed with more than one prestigious company around the U.S. of A., but she had also come to the realization that her true love of performance also dwelled within acting. When we caught up with her she was working the NYC film scene, taking classes, getting cast in various small budget, independent features and television spots, and eventually auditioning for bigger budget projects (30 Rock, anyone?). Then came the time to make that difficult, risky, thrilling decision every professional actor must make at some point: to move to L.A. or not to move to L.A. So she did what any smart woman would do; she followed her heart and can now be found among the palm fronds and sculpted abs of Hollywoodland.
Well, thus far, luck has truly been a lady. Jennifer's latest accomplishments? Getting cast on CSI: NY, a contract that awarded her entrance into the often elusive and always exclusive Screen Actors Guild. Oh yeah, and, uh, within this last week she was also privileged enough to land an audition for a lead role in a feature film alongside....wait for it....Mr. Matt Damon (cue collective swoon). BUT, what is MOST impressive to us is that Jennifer has accomplished all of this WITHOUT REPRESENTATION. What does that mean? It means, simply put, Jennifer does not have an agent. She does all her own leg work, all her own networking, is her own boss managing her own talent, and is proving everyday to aspiring actors everywhere that there is no one right way to "make it" in L.A. (did we mention that Jennifer was the only female auditioning for that lead role w/ M. Damon who was self-represented? Woah.).
Jennifer is one of TCO's great mentors, continuously striding towards her dreams with grace and ease, never yielding to fear or doubt. She is the epitome of hard work and dedication, has a kick-ass business sense, and, of course, is extremely talented. And don't worry, she is still dancing. If you are in the vicinity of Venice, California this weekend, stop by the Electric Lounge to see Jennifer perform a Gothic waltz ballet in Astra von Berlifitzing. But before you run out and jump in your car, you've got some quick homework. Please check out Jiffy's official website through the 'Jiffy Reed' link under 'TCO Required Reading'. There you can view some of her self-produced dancing videos, see her acting reel, check out her ever-expanding resumes, gaze into her alluring eyes through her lovely headshots, and much more.
ALSO, CLICK HERE for a fantastic interview Jiffy did for the popular entertainment industry blog, "The Industry Insider."
We love you, Jiffy!

We now interupt our regularly scheduled programming for a "TCO Inspirational Moment"

Turn away brutish men and gruff women who are not comfortable with the sappy expression of human emotion. Today TCO had the great privilege of observing senior citizens with total visual impairment perform karate. This after having also had the privilege of hearing Dr. James Kutsch speak on the topic of "Daring to Succeed" in a world that more often than not shuts out persons with disabilities. Dr. Kutsch, it should be noted, is a fine fellow who, despite becoming immediately blinded (and an amputee) at the age of 16 when one of his chemical experiments blew up in his hands one afternoon in his backyard, went on to excel at electrical engineering and earned two PhDs (Computer Tech. and Humanities). His speech today was about making change happen for yourself, rather than waiting for it to happen on its own. He claims that while some great changes may very well happen if you wait long enough (black president, anyone?) over all, it's important to analyze what is and isn't working now in your day to day, and how you can change those things to be workable, or in his case accessible and usable, successes. Take the risk to innovate in your own life, and you will find yourself achieving what you never before thought possible. Kutsch used his creative genius in the 1960s to figure out how to tell time on his own by taking the glass off his clock so he could feel the hands. Later on? He created radio dials that can be deciphered based on audible tone levels, then he applied tones to decipher data output on his computer through morse code, then he built his own brail printer, then he constructed the first ever talking computer, then, then, then... Rather than hold out for the already rapid evolution of modern technology to include a man with a visual impairment, or the entire collective of individuals with disabilities for that matter, Kutsch continues to step up to plate and make a grand salami look easy. Sound like an applicable theme for the life and times of the artistically ambitious? Absolutely. Go ahead, grab a tissue, you know you wanna. And here, cradle this comforting mug of Mama's hot chocolate.
Now back to your Stories.

This Means WAR!

If you are standing, you might want to take a seat. Maybe grab a glass of smooth brandy to help deal with this awesomeness. Today we received word from the one and only, Phil Butane. Now, granted, it's been a little while since we last had an update from Phil, but we always knew him to have his hands in some great projects, generally revolving around his work as a freelance film editor. But his current project? Our minds are officially blown. First, though, let's back up a bit. We met Phil, aka R. Cyn (pronounced 'arson'), back during our own stint as a hamster for Turn of the Century Pictures, a documentary film company located in a most spectacular penthouse suite in SoHo. Phil was the company's trusty editor in residence. Many a long hour we spent shootin' the shit with Phil in his darkened hole of an editing office, and we got to watch him evolve from a rookie editor into a confident, fully armed editor assassin. So when we eventually heard that Phil had left TOTCP to become that freelance editor of his dreams, we weren't surprised. Now, there is no denying that Phil is a talented editor. But it wasn't until he happened to let it slip that he occasionally performed as a hip hop artist, that we discovered Phil was also waving a serious freak flag behind the mic on the regular. Naturally we went to see one of his shows. We then were given a CD of some of his stuff, which we immediately downloaded and repeatedly enjoyed on our iPod. It was clear that Phil's passion, his calling, was in his music. So, when we heard today that Phil still does the editing thing, of course, but is putting most of his energy into his music, again it didn't surprise us. What does surprise us? Not only does Phil have a new album in the works specializing in the juicy, politically-charged content we love, but also a full-blown music video, multiple related websites, a band blog, and has been featured on the "Best of Myspace." You can check out his main website through the "Goldishack Guerrillas" link or go directly to his blog, "Guerrillas Speak", both under 'TCO Required Reading.'
BUT FIRST, ladies and gentlemen, TCO presents to you, the Goldishack Guerrillas performing, "Lazy, Fat, Stupid American, Featuring Rush Limbaugh" for their forthcoming album, "WAR": NOTE: Phil is the fine fellow seated to the right on the couch.

THE FOLLOWING LINK CONTAINS ADULT CONTENT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeK5HBGsUWg

Our American Idol

Even though it's snowing in New York City on the first day of Spring, and everyone is grumbling and tired because it's Friday morning, our hearts were warmed and delighted to find a new update in our inbox from Her Majesty, Jessica Roncker. We met Jess while serving as one of her lowly, confused interns at the Feminist Press, years ago, but our bond was beyond any sort of boundaries set by our office ranks--perhaps because we share a very similar sarcastic, highly intelligent yet arguably criminal wit that did not necessarily thrive within the confines of the Press. Jess left the Press not too long after our internship ran its course, and she has since gone on to leave Manhattan island for more solid ground in the Kentucky heartland. But not after first landing a most unexpected and entertaining job as a sweaty-towel-washing hamster for the American Idol Summer Tour for Season 4, the year of Carrie Underwood, hosted appropriately by Pop Tarts. We partied with her late one evening that year, when the tour roared through NYC, and we shared some special eye-contact with an over-zealous Constantine Maroulis and a greasy Bo Bice. The following year, the year of Taylor Hicks or more notably, Chris Daughtry and Kathrine McPhee, Jess returned to the Idol tour, and this time we attended one of the dazzlingly uncomfortable Long Island concerts and watched the season's top 12 give it their best shot. We left that concert with two unforgettable memories:
1. That of a drunken mother, screaming and jumping around near us up in the bleachers as her breasts all but flew out of her very low cut shirt. Next to her her teenage daughter slouched and scowled, bored out of her mind , looking around at the empty seats. The mother at one point turned to us and shouted, "It's my birthday!". Cougars don't set that bar too high, folks, and they don't ask for much.
2. Because we were the friends of a tour staff member, we were allowed back stage and promptly whisked into an SUV alongside a smattering of higher numbered Idols and their parents. As we flew out of the garage, past many more screaming mothers and their daughters, we waved--the windows were darkened, so all fans saw faintly were our waving hands, but that was enough to assume it was the hand of Chris or Taylor, a desperate dream come true. And at that moment inside the our vehicle, (un?)lucky Idol number 13, a tiny boy of a teenager who was tenderly referred to as, "Chicken Little," responded to an inquiry about his summer plans. "What I SHOULD be doing this summer is traveling on this fucking tour!" An amusingly bitter, bitter young fellow.
Now we are pleased to announce, that after putting in her time (she has been doing the summer tours ever since), and even getting some off-season gigs with such celebrity wonders as the Spice Girls--"I am watching little Beckham's run by me right now; David is so nice by the way," she wrote from the road on the reunion tour-- Jess has officially been promoted to American Idol Summer Tour MANAGER. She is now THE Big Cheese, running the entire show, putting out flames, checking into L.A. in mid-May and making the magic happen until the end of September. It's quite an amazing accomplishment, and we are so proud!!! Way to go, Jess! We can't wait to see you and another set of fantasmic 12 again soon on your way through the Big Apple! Congrats! You can check out Jess's hilarious and addictive blog, Ronckytonk, where she also includes notes from the road, under 'TCO Required Reading'.

I DEFINITELY LEGO N.Y.!

We received this great link today from arguably one of the most handsome members of the TCO community, Alex Broz. Currently residing with his equally if not more dashing wife in Brooklyn, New York, he found the following article posted in the Opinion section of the New York Times from Monday, February 2, 2009 to be inspiring. While it may be even easier to appreciate the artist's message if you do happen to live in New York City, there is no question that Christoph Niemann's work is universally touching. Here is the link for your enjoyment:

http://niemann.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/02/02/i-lego-ny/?emc=eta1

Thanks, Alex!

Do it Yourself!

We received a great new update from the beautiful and amazing Brie Schwartz today, founder of BE, a company promoting better living through the power of meditative motion. BE regularly develops new interactive initiatives, such as YOGA INSTRUCTOR, described in detail here. Brie also recently came out with her own iPhone application, YOGA INSTRUCTOR, the link to which can be found in 'TCO Required Reading'. The second paragraph of the following description below includes a bit more too on what Brie has been dedicating her creative self to for the past 7+ years, on top of traveling around the world. Check it out!

YOGA INSTRUCTOR. BE your own guru.

The true definition of yoga is to yoke, to create union, to bring the mind, body, and spirit into one. No one knows how to unify this triad better than yourself, and YOGA INSTRUCTOR supports you in this practice.

These postures are a way of living; a science stemming from a several thousand year-old practice. The physical benefits of yoga increases cardiovascular, respiratory efficiency and body tone; decreases blood pressure; normalizes weight and endocrine function; improves immunity, sleep, strength, posture, balance, flexibility, and more. The psychological benefits aid your overall well-being.

You are the guru. No one can tell you better than yourself what your body needs. Yoga is a practice that helps you be more consciously aware of this unique union of your mind, body, and spirit. Through YOGA INSTRUCTOR, Brie Anne Schwartz, RYT, TTM, founder of BE, LLC a company dedicated to conscious living, will empower your personal yogic journey. Brie’s background encompasses yoga instruction of styles from around the world, international directorship and choreography of dance methods, qigong, martial arts, and other healing methodologies as breath, meditation, energy, and thai message. She has taught in North America, Central America, and Europe.

YOGA INSTRUCTOR is a safe and diversified yogic practice that you can take anywhere, anytime, and customize your practice. YOGA INSTRUCTOR reminds you that you’re the master of your health and provides the opportunity to practice at your convenience.

YOGA INSTRUCTOR details:

YOGA INSTUCTOR includes the three (3) most well-known salutations:

Sun Salutation A: Is a full practice in itself as it is a yoga salutation. It lengthens, strengthens, and tones ALLthe main muscles of the body while restoring the lungs and blood with healing oxygen.

Sun Salutation B: Is a full practice in itself, however it is more complicated than Sun Salutation A as it involves a high lunge which streches and strengthens your legs, tones the major hip muscle known as psoas, as well as brings flexibility and support to the lower back.

Moon Salutation: Is a full practice in itself as it is a yoga salutation. It also brings further focus on chest opening, balance, lower body toning, and flexibility of the entire back.

Overall Salutation Benefits: a full practice in itself, warms body, tones digestive system, strengthens abdominals, cleans respiratory system, normalizes endocrine glands, reduces fat, refreshes skin, increases flexibility, stimulates spine, and more. (Bodily Care: consult a doctor before practicing any yoga salutations; in all poses remember to breathe deeply, lengthen the spine, keep the chest open and shoulders rolled back, align joints when possible: wrists under shoulders, ankles under knees when knee is bent at 90-degrees)

PLUS…

YOGA INSTRUCTOR includes three (3) more sequences:

Grounding Root (a hip opening sequence)

Benefits: Although hip openers can be the most intense postures physically and emotionally, they are vital to our health, especially if you work at a desk: normalizes nervous system, eliminates stress, reduces back pain, supports knees, strengthens hip area from injury, and more. (hip care: if you had hip or knee injuries consult a doctor before practicing deep hip stretches, relax muscles and breathe deeply, never force yourself into a hip stretch)

Spiral Flight (a spinal twist sequence)

Benefits: maintains overall health by bringing oxygen and fresh blood to internal organs, keeps the spine flexible and strong, supports the musculoskeletal system and digestion, lengthens the muscles, tendons, ligaments, and fascia around the spine, abdomen, rib cage, and hips, and more. (spinal care: if you had disk injuries consult a doctor before practicing deep spinal stretches, never force your spine into a posture, start and extend the stretch from the hip joint/sacrum, always lengthen the spine)

Tri-Warrior (a warrior and triangle fusion sequence)

Benefits: eliminates stress, protects back, increases respiration and circulation, strengthens abdominals, legs, leg joints, and shoulders, opens hips, and more. (knee care: if you had hip or knee injuries consult a doctor before practicing this sequence, ankles under knees when knee is bent at 90-degress; slightly bend knee if you have hyper-extension)

Extra! Extra!

On March 26, 2009, the New York Review of Books ran the following ad:



This particular project was the brain-child of Harper Collins Editor, Peter Hubbard, another one of our near and dear friends here in New York City. He casually fanned the ad in front of us over dinner one evening last week, simply saying, "Look." We of course did look, and then freaked out over such a great accomplishment. Originally, Peter's idea was to take an old classic of philosophical thought, and re-issue it, complete with a snappy new cover design, as a work equally as applicable today as when it originated. The result? Eight complete re-issued works, and a new Harper Perennial campaign, Modern Thought. Not to mention that in the process, Peter was formally promoted to full fledged Editor. You can find a link to one of his current side-works-in-progress, The Serialist, under 'TCO Required Reading'. Maybe Peter can help us with our forever inconsistent use of the old, crazy comma. Great work, Peter!

The Man, The Actor.

Back in August we received a surprise email from a great friend of many years, Will Godfrey, sharing his new acting reel. We knew that he had been living in California and that he was pursuing acting, but we were especially pleased to see just what a great actor he is. In 'TCO Required Reading' you will find a link to his IMDB page. Note, however, that he is known professionally as Wilton Godfrey. For your viewing pleasure, we now pass on his reel:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kG9K30xDxns

"The Very Secret Order..."

This came to us today from Lauren Hardage. Some of you may know her better as Lauren Moore, her name prior to getting married to Zach Hardage in the desert of Arizona in July many a moon ago. She currently resides in Corpus Christi, TX, while Zach is serving in the military. She is a freelance graphic designer and a very good one at that! See her link under 'TCO Required Reading'. Lauren writes:

I just ran across this online via a great design
magazine (Veer) + wanted to send it.
It's kind of neat; a downloadable "drill book"
for creatives.
Peek at it if you have a chance.

http://www.veer.com/download/pdf/veer200812_memberdrillbook.pdf

We would say do more than peek at this link. These are great exercises to keep that artistic right brain movin' and shakin', no matter your particular artistic talents. Not to mention, all of it is quite humorous (our favorite!). It may take a second to load, but it's worth it!
Thanks, Lauren!

The Comical Observatory welcomes you! We provide up-to-date information on a small but powerful nucleus of creatives and their ever-expanding work. Occasionally, of course, we will also offer our own timely critiques and post our own projects. Check back in again soon for our next official posting!